Author: Frances Solá-Santiago

The Problem With Being A ‘Gentleman’

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Last night, Donald Trump threw a hilarious joke: “I’m a gentleman.” We all laughed. Some people in the audience cheered. Yet, it felt so wrong because it was. I think we can all agree that Donald Trump thought he was being a gentleman when he took a woman furniture shopping. I think we can all agree that his definition of gentlemanliness includes grabbing women by their pussies and move on them. But, Donald Trump is not the only one claiming to be a gentleman. Every man is. The inherent characteristic of gentlemanliness is sexist. It includes actions such as opening doors, pulling back chairs, paying for dinner and proposing marriage. In the traditional sense, being a gentleman is an acknowledgment of power, and that is a problem. To Donald Trump being a gentleman includes letting Hillary Clinton answer questions first promulgating the sexist practice of “Ladies first.” It’s providing expensive gifts for women to be impressed by his success, instead of his brain (that would be difficult, though). It’s being a “macho” who is stronger, …

Think: Is Fashion Worth Fainting For? Yeezy Thinks So

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Fashion Week kicked off today with Kanye West’s Yeezy fashion show at Roosevelt Island in New York City. The infamous rapper turned designer turned Kardashian turned Taylor Swift’s nemesis decided to showcase his new collection with models standing under the blistering sun for over an hour. It was just a matter of time until one of them collapsed and one did. Not that fashion hasn’t seen its fair share of ridiculousness, but West has taken it to the core of labor rights. The working condition of models is one of the most controversial issues the fashion industry has had to battle for years. Canadian model Coco Rocha has been an advocate for The Model Alliance, a non-profit that pleads for the fair treatment of models, especially with measures regarding weight, age and schedules. Yet, Yeezy forces models to stand in the sun with no protection and no water for hours just to serve as props for his performance. No apologies followed. The industry was outraged:  Sad to say but we have a bunch of idiots …

File No. 11: Desirée Velázquez, fashion designer

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Pop culture would have us believe that being a fashion designer is one of the most glamorous jobs available. Thanks to Project Runway we know it’s not true. The aspiring designers experience nervous breakdowns at Parsons The New School for Design making every moment count because, as Heidi Klum has taught us for some time, in fashion one day you are in and the next day you are out. This was the case of Desirée Velázquez, who did it all off-camera and with no pay. “I moved to New York with $1,000 and a credit card. That was it”, recalls the 28-year-old freelance fashion designer, while sitting at Astoria Coffee, wearing her signature cat-eye and red lipstick. Desirée is a CAD designer for Carolina Herrera and was part of the launch of Katy Perry’s shoe collection with Global Brands Group last year. The break came after she experienced her first layoff at Ohne Titel, a small fashion company founded by Parsons alumni Alexa Adams and Flora Gill that closed last spring. She took the opportunity …

Female Breakups Are Just As Shitty

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I endured my first breakup when I was 17. Yet, as devastating as it was, it never compared to the second. Throughout my entire life I thought it would hurt more to be dumped by a man than by a female friend, but I was wrong. It was worse, way worse. The thing about friendships is that, somehow, they never seem to equate to romantic love in the eyes of society. Everyone looks for a partner, even when they already have a circle of friends to support them when shit goes crazy. The incessant search for a romantic partner keeps alive the narrative that we need another half to be okay, and that no matter how fulfilled we might feel with our friendships it will never be the same. But, as my former best friend slammed my apartment door as she left that summer night, I found myself being dumped again. The truth is that a friendship breakup needs to be mourned, just as we sit for hours watching sad movies and eating ice cream …

Wearing Black Makes Me Happy

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We all do something to feel powerful. I dress in black. It’s one of the most distinctive characteristics of my personal style, aside from wearing a leather jacket (black, of course) and red lipstick. Although it wasn’t always the case, my mornings have become prettier, easier and more inspiring since I started wearing black as armor. This phenomenon started in January 2015 when I moved to Madrid, Spain to study at the Complutense University. Because of the low temperatures, no one cared about trends and it no longer mattered if my coat and boots didn’t go together. So, during my first month in Madrid, I substituted my red trench coat for a navy and black one I got at the Zara sale in hopes to simplify my mornings. The constant travel also contributed to this change. You can enjoy the not-so-routinely routine of planes, buses and trains crossing all over Europe way better when you don’t think about what you are wearing. But, my mother taught me to never let style go, so I instilled …

On Moving to New York

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I’ve seen enough episodes of Sex and the City by now to know that life is not a sitcom. Men like Big don’t change; they become even bigger assholes. Also, Manolo Blahnik shoes are not affordable for a freelance writer. I know all those clichés and fantasies built around New York City are exactly that: media constructed narratives. Still, I am eager to set foot in New York City today because it’s been 10 years since the first time I said I wanted to live there and the day has finally come. I thought I wouldn’t be able to sleep yesterday, yet I did. It’s surprising given that all the times I’ve moved before I wasn’t able to shut eyes the day before. I’m calm, yet excited, and a little scared, to be honest. But, I’ve watched enough Scandal to understand that when you are scared everything is put into perspective and so you follow your gut, as Olivia Pope would, and it all feels right. What is it they say? If you can’t stop …

What the Last Week At Work Is Like

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Occupation: Part-Time Content Developer Time at the job: 11 months Monday The feels are real because I’m on my period. As usual, I have breakfast at work: cream and coffee. My successor is already at my desk by the time I get there, which makes me proud to have chosen someone punctual and responsible (adulting accomplished!). By 10 am, I am in full training session with him. My boss is back from a week-long vacation, so the pressure is on to hand in last week’s projects. Facebook’s Power Editor is being a pain, and my work wife left early, so Monday already sucks. I have pasta with chicken for lunch at the cafeteria, and take some time to get to know my replacement. Again, I chose well. Training session is back on. A last-minute client fucks up my afternoon mood, but I try to keep calm: the client comes first. By 5:30, we decide to clock out. Conclusion: The boss will always bully you on your last week with jokes about you leaving. Suck it …

4 Books to Read This Summer

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Admit it: summer is not only a synonym of vacations. It is also a time when we, unconsciously, reflect on the past six months of the year, weighing whether or not we’ve kept the promises we made ourselves when the new year rang in. If we have failed, the guilt trip is bound to come around. And if we have, we constantly look for ways to keep them up, mostly through reading. I am one of those people who, like Joan Didion, writes to find out what she is thinking. I also read to find out what the fuck is going on in my head. I seek wisdom from other women writers, while I also try to find stories that make mine seem okay, like I’m not the only one with existential crises or lousy friends. So, this summer, as I prepare to embark on a Master’s Degree come fall, I’m grabbing a bottle of sunblock and my favorite bikini to escape to the nearest beach with a book in hand to do exactly that: …

File No. 9: Claudia Hilario, blogger, Bodega Blush

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I was present during some of the initial conversations that sparked the launch of Bodega Blush. Just a few months prior, I met Claudia Hilario, its founder. At this point, she was an editor at Primera Hora with 10 years of experience behind her. But, a dream is unstoppable, and so, Claudia’s was no exception. A few weeks after revealing her plans to us, Claudia left the company to launch her own blog. As an accomplished editor, it’s a move not many have the ovaries to make. But, when you have a clique of badass friends and an idea, it’s justifiable that you leave your job to create an online platform dedicated to all the things you love: fashion and drinking. Bodega Blush now has over 1,000 Facebook likes and has done collaborations with big name brands like Sally Hansen and Tito’s Vodka. The goal is to demystify the notion that women and alcohol are mutually exclusive. And so, we toast to Claudia and her big dreams, to her daughter Elena and to the many …